Understanding the difference.  

Daytimer09B 50M
254 posts
11/9/2018 6:01 am
Understanding the difference.


From what I read on a lot of... the short profile (as seen by non-gold ballers) and some in the blogs about non-bloggers, there seems to be a lot of men taking a line or two out of a profile and thinking it applies directly to them, a total stranger, and develop expectations based on that information. I can see where some may get confused, like when a woman says something of this sorts... "looking for a tall man with dreamy eyes who can sweep me off my feet." Well, I am a tall man. I have been told I have dreamy eyes, therefore she must be talking about me. In that brief description it does not say all of the other things that is going through her mind like, does not live with their mother (lol), has a good paying job, likes cats... lots of cats, etc. It is really a slippery slope because if she does put all of that in there then she would most likely be categorized as a crazy cat lady, which she may be, or a total B****. Plus, since probably most men on here are non-paying members they can see the rest or would not take the time to read the rest anyways.

I think that is one of the biggest disconnects on here. In addition, if a man is feeling especially frisky or horny at the moment, all common sense goes out the window and it is simply... Here is a female, she has what I . She lives within driving distance. She is on a sex site so she must be wanting what I got. I wrong ladies?

Now, this brings me to the blogs and to replies on comments. First and foremost I a little bit of a flirt in real life with waitresses, hostess, just service people in general. Not the over the top kind of flirting but the pick them up and make them feel better type of flirting. If it makes them feel better and in return gets me better service, then it is a win win for both. So when I make comments on pictures a blogging friend posts, which some are really tantalizing, or to something that they may write that makes me a little frisky inside. Then I totally understand that their reply being something like... I would love to help you with lotion on those hard to reach places... is simply fun flirtatious talk and nothing more. They could actually mean it but it does not mean... hey, this woman wants me. I to flood her email box and pester the crap out of her. NO... it means that you found a woman with a great sense of humor who enjoys flirtatious shorts because it makes both of you feel good. And who knows, maybe one day it will turn into something else, but it is only because you were friends first and therefor each of you opened up your window of opportunity. I would say that probably 95-99% of the people I come into contact on this site I will never meet in person, but I can certainly enjoy their company and comments here in Blogville.

Enjoy your kick off to the weekend!

Daytimer09B 50M
380 posts
11/9/2018 6:02 am

Sorry, that got longer than I mean it to be.


pocogato12 66F  
23521 posts
11/9/2018 6:08 am

Maybe is got longer ( pun intended) but the intention is very clear. Smarten up guys

(Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 8:45 am:
Longer is always better in some cases... at least that's what guys want anyways.

author51 55F  
63712 posts
11/9/2018 6:13 am

    Quoting Daytimer09B:
    Sorry, that got longer than I mean it to be.
You hit the nail on the head with those men who think a simple flirt obviously means we want them in our beds and right this instant...lol. and yes they flood our email boxes.. This morning I got another strange one. His opening line was Hi! Remember me? I said um... not at the moment no. He replied I'm... and he stated his name. I than said, "I know a lot of men here with that name, Have we met? He said, No, not in person but I was on here a long time ago and thought you might have remembered me from before...

I started to laugh as we women get swamped with messages daily and forget a lot of the thousands of handles on here.. I hurt his feelings for not remembering him....lol.

I love when my fellow bloggers flirt and I do with them either on blogs, in comments or messages with them...Thanks for posting this...

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 8:53 am:
I guess he must not have been as memorable as he thought he was. lol We guys tend to believe we are unforgettable sometimes. I do speaking engagements at state conferences and from time to time I will run into someone who will start talking to me about things and the whole time I am wondering where do I know them from. The problem being, we have never met before and they did not clarify. Very confusing. I am sure it is that way when you get a lot of email but have never met the individual, how are you suppose to remember them... unless they were a total unforgettable dushebag. I love flirts on here, it makes me feel desirable and sometimes I even blush though no one can see that side of me.

Carollooking 48F  
6 posts
11/9/2018 6:42 am

Thank you for posting this honest blog. Another thing is the men on this site do not seem to read what is posted on profiles. My person I want to meet is a female but men keep sending me emails and IM requests and that's annoying. Read first and contact only other people who seem to be a match with you or not at all. Thanks again.


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 8:55 am:
I hear you loud and clear on that one. I get emails and IM's from men wanting to give me a BJ. My very short profile says I AM TOTALLY STRAIGHT! Some people never learned to read I guess. Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

misskissin 55F  
73103 posts
11/9/2018 6:47 am

This is a great post. That picking out one line of a profile and attaching yourself to it is so true. Conversely the not filling out even the basics on a profile is so frustrating to me. People often say no one reads profiles... well a lot of us do and it helps us determine if there is anything basic in common to take a conversation further.

On the flirting side of things, I think you are spot on. When you connect with a blogger it is fun to flirt, maybe someday you get the chance to meet, maybe you just stay virtual friends. Either way it makes things more fun here.


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 9:00 am:
I do think if you are here to meet someone or make a physical connection in person you need to fill the whole thing out so that it makes for a better first meet. Mine is not filled out because I am just here for the blogs.

Flirting in the blogs with other bloggers is like bing in our own private secret club. We are all here for a reason and feeling attractive, sexy and loved is definitely a part of the equation.

Carollooking 48F  
6 posts
11/9/2018 6:47 am

Oh and one more thing. Just because I might view your profile does not mean that I'm interested or I want you. Sometimes I click on profiles after being notified that I had just been viewed by a profile so I'm just curious not interested. If I am interested I will let you know but if I don't that should tell you something. Have a great day.


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 9:05 am:
Very true. I get a lot of profile views from people who are nowhere near where I live. Not sure how they find me unless it is through the blogs. However, I get a lot of what I call faux views as well. I'm sure there is an alga rhythm written to make sure all members get views to keep them interested in the site. Like so many other things like false flirts, it is very frustrating. And then there is the ones that say you viewed them simply because you drug your cursor across their profile picture. That is not the same as viewing their profile to me. Wish that did not show up the same way.

bitchkitty2017 66F  
1252 posts
11/9/2018 6:52 am

I agree with the gals here picking out a line that may be fun or funny and just a bit of flirt on the womans side of the coin isn't a come on from her maybe a few would like to think that if she puts a subtle come on in her profile then we he has to try to see whats she is getting at..and frustrating it is when a profile does not say anything much ..most women read profiles much to the dismay of the guys we are somewhat more choosy about a partner ....


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 9:09 am:
It only makes sense that so many men don't read profiles that they also don't fill them out either. No wonder so many men get frustrated with this site. The ads promise a lot and they can't deliver on their insinuations. It is probably a miracle that there are any women on this site at all.

BiggLala 46F  
24225 posts
11/9/2018 7:21 am

I'm usually a flirt, but I consider it more cheeky than actual flirting. I'm cheeky with men and women, like with servers. However, my habit of flirting is one of the reasons I stopped 'flirting' right away or with men...until I've gotten to know them better.

One thing I cannot stand in the blogs is when some men (usually standard members) take the opportunity to flirt without establishing themselves as a regular responder, and/or flirting without at least commenting on the topic. I understand that is usually the only way standard members have direct communication with people, but timing and knowing your audience is everything. The comment is public and can put the woman on the spot, so-to-speak, where she might feel uncomfortable. She has to be careful in how she responds, i.e. find the balance between 'nice and cordial' while not being perceived as leading him on if she harmlessly flirts back. Just like in real life, lol.

Need a way to message ALL members?...click the following link for helpful instructions in setting up a private messaging blog post: Build your own Private Postbox Receive Readable Messages and Reply.


Daytimer09B replies on 11/9/2018 9:18 am:
I do believe in that regard the females are judged or viewed differently than men. Most men do not read through all the comments on a post where as I think women do. I have a different level of flirting depending on how well I know the individual. For someone new whom I do not know it will be more complimentary and not sexual in nature where as someone whom I have had a lot of conversations with I might use some induwindows(?) for fun. Some women enjoy sexy flirting and others may shy away because of it. Does not make either better or lesser than the other. And sometimes guys, talking about myself here, ask questions out of curiosity that can bring back some not to pleasant memories of feelings like I did in my last post by accident.

author51 55F  
63712 posts
11/10/2018 1:12 am

    Quoting author51:
    You hit the nail on the head with those men who think a simple flirt obviously means we want them in our beds and right this instant...lol. and yes they flood our email boxes.. This morning I got another strange one. His opening line was Hi! Remember me? I said um... not at the moment no. He replied I'm... and he stated his name. I than said, "I know a lot of men here with that name, Have we met? He said, No, not in person but I was on here a long time ago and thought you might have remembered me from before...

    I started to laugh as we women get swamped with messages daily and forget a lot of the thousands of handles on here.. I hurt his feelings for not remembering him....lol.

    I love when my fellow bloggers flirt and I do with them either on blogs, in comments or messages with them...Thanks for posting this...
I blush as well and always have when paid a compliment.It is those who do in my real world that start to laugh when my face turns as red as my hair...lol.

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


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